Hostage Negotiation
It was supposed to be a fun trip to Disneyland. Someone said we were heading there, and I didn’t think twice about it. At first, everything seemed normal. The car ride was quiet, maybe a little tense, but nothing too unusual. I figured they were just focused on driving. Originally, I was hesitant to go because they had exhibited emotional instability on prior occasions. But, I thought that I could give them a chance to prove that they had changed.
What I thought was an extension to offer peace turned into a total nightmare. Things started to change quickly once they opened their mouth. They got into an argument with me, and the whole mood shifted. The way they were driving became reckless—speeding, swerving, and taking sharp turns that made my heart race. That’s when I realized this wasn’t about going to Disneyland at all. The entire trip was a setup, and I was trapped in the car with no idea what was going to happen next.
Fear hit me like a wave. It wasn’t just nerves; it was the kind of fear that leaves you frozen for a second, trying to figure out what to do. I grabbed my phone and called my brother. As soon as he picked up, I couldn’t hold back. I started crying, trying to explain what was happening. My voice was shaky, but my brother stayed calm. He asked questions, trying to get a sense of what was going on, and told me to keep talking to him.
I couldn’t even bring myself to look at her, let alone speak to her. I just sat there, holding the phone, crying, and listening to my brother’s steady voice. What I didn’t know at the time was that he’d recently watched Chris Voss’s MasterClass on negotiation. Those skills turned out to be exactly what we needed. Chris Voss is a former FBI hostage negotiator and a renowned expert in negotiation techniques. He is the founder and CEO of The Black Swan Group, a consulting firm that specializes in negotiation training and strategy for businesses and individuals. Voss is widely recognized for his ability to apply principles of hostage negotiation to business and personal negotiations.
My brother didn’t panic or yell. Instead, he used this calm, confident tone that seemed to cut through all the chaos. He talked to her directly, saying things that made her stop and think instead of getting angrier. One thing he said really stood out: “You probably feel like no one’s understanding your side right now.” It was like flipping a switch. Her tone shifted, and things started to calm down.
The whole time, I just kept crying and listening to him handle it. It felt like hours, but eventually, she pulled over and let me out in a safe place. Walking away from that car was the biggest relief I’ve ever felt. Hearing my brother still on the line reminded me I wasn’t alone.
Looking back, I realize how important it was to let myself feel what I was feeling in that moment. Sometimes crying isn’t about giving up—it’s about letting it out so you can keep going. And knowing my brother had my back gave me the strength to get through it.
That day taught me a lot. It showed me how quickly things can take a turn and how important it is to act when your instincts tell you something is wrong. It also showed me how powerful calm communication can be, even in the most intense situations. My brother didn’t just help me escape—he used what he learned to take control of a moment that felt completely out of control.
I’ll never forget what happened, but I’ll also never forget how much it mattered to have someone I could trust in my corner. That’s the kind of thing you carry with you, no matter what.
